Twenty reasons why students of opposite sex cohabit

Written by Patricia Udeh

Heterosexual cohabitation is an increasingly prevalent lifestyle among students of tertiary institutions in Nigeria. This refers to when a boy and girl not yet married live together. It also known as ‘campus marriage’.  Some people have spoken against this development which seems to be trending in tertiary institutions today but some others have seen good reasons why people indulge in this act. Below is a collection of opinions compiled by a research group, hypothesis.com, on why students of opposite sex cohabit.

  1. Food security: Students cohabit to ensure that there is always food on the table. One person uses his or her pocket money to take care of the couple if the other is dry.
  2. Status symbol: Some students simply cohabit with the opposite sex to show that they also belong. This means such persons believe that those who cohabit are seen as big boys and girls, therefore they indulge in same.
  3. Peer pressure: Some students, especially the naïve ones, cohabit because their friends are doing so and they think it is the vogue.
  4. Overcrowding of hostels: Some students could be discouraged to stay in hostels because of the large number of people that occupy a room. This includes other complaints of poor facilities in the hostel. Such students could be compelled by such circumstances to cohabit with their partner staying off campus.
  5. Reading together: Some students may study well only when they are with their opposite sex partner. Two reading mates could get emotionally attached and decide to take the relationship to another level, that is not just becoming friends but also cohabiting.
  6. Praying together: Don’t doubt any reason. A boy and a girl may be living together in order to improve their prayer life as prayer partners.
  7. General Economic reasons: They share house rent and other materials/accessories in the house. Economic factor has been identified as one of the basic reasons for cohabitation, that is, apart from the usual suspect (sex).
  8. Courtship: Those who have agreed to marry live together in order to learn how to live when they get married.
  9. Social security: Some girls pack into their boy friend’s lodge when they suspect him or going after other guys. They feel protected socially when they are living with the person. Some boys also pack into their girl friend’s room for this reason (though this is rare). In this case, cohabitation is done to prevent cheating by the opposite sex.
  10. Revenge: Some girls live with a boy to spite their former boy friend who may have left them unceremoniously to go after another girl. This is to prove to the boy that they can always get another guy.
  11. Play safe: Some people feel that living together is actually a safe way to avoid sexually transmitted diseases since you are tied to one person whom you are sure of.
  12. Frustration: Some girls frustrated due basically to lack of money or personal crisis could decide to move into a guy’s room. She may feel protected by the guy.
  13. Solitude: Some girls would not want to be lonely. They always feel involved and excited living with someone of opposite sex.
  14. Home training: In extreme cases, a girl who was never given the opportunity to have a boy friend while at home gets to school and tends to get carried away by moving into a room to live with a guy. When parents always monitor them at home they seize the slightest opportunity of freedom to have fun and tend to overdo it.
  15. Distance: This may sound flimsy but some girls could decide to live with their boy if his lodge is closer to school than hers. A guy could also move in to live with his girl friend for this reason if she agrees.
  16. Protection from Lecturers: This may also be rare but some girls could decide to live with a guy so that any lecturer who is chasing them will hear it and leave her alone.
  17. Broken home: A student who is a product of a broken home could be cohabiting due to lack of home training, lack of parental love, or frequently seeing the single parent at home with female or male friends, as the case may be. If a girl lives with her mother and her male lovers are always coming to the house to visit her and take her out, the girl who may be naïve could be led to think that living with men is the way of life.
  18. Parental Behaviour: Even where a student is not from a broken home, the carefree attitude of parents could mislead a child. When parents are fund of exhibiting their infidelity when their children are around this could lead to social misbehaviour on the part of the child when he or she gets into the university. When a man is fund of bringing girlfriends home when the wife is not around the kids who observe this could be led to engage in queer social behaviour one of which is cohabitation.
  19. Spending more time together: Some students cohabit to spend more time together knowing quite well that they can’t get married. A way to get the most out of the relationship is to cohabit so that if one the partners gets married after school the other one won’t feel it much.
  20. Unknown: This may sound strange but some girls do not really have any reason why they cohabit. They simply live with a man without any known compulsion or motivation.
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Are there points you do not agree with?

The Author

Chinenye Nwabueze

Nwabueze is a communication researcher with several years of lecturing experience in Nigerian universities.

19 Comments

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  1. Nwankwo onyinye grace

    Lol… Odikwaegwu. My children is in the university…. My people are destroy because they lack common knowledge…. In all your getting get understanding.. They are just deceiving their selves all in the name of love…But not knowing that all their bad deeds are somewhere waiting for them… Parents should train up their children in a Godly way… So that in any circumstances they find themselves they won’t depart from the good morals installed on them..

  2. okonkwo Mary oge

    point number 11.i disagree with it to play safe is never a reason to pack in to a boy’s house because most of the girls still cheat at that been under the protection of gold circle .i believe they cohabit because they have no shame and moral code of conduct

  3. Point number 11, if you stay with öne guy that does not mean you are free from s.t.d because you dont kwon where the guy is going to,who he meets or sleep with so staying with someone you are not married to is not a good idea.

  4. Hmm, though all the points may sound logical but it’s not our culture and the society frown at such behavior:I think it should be discouraged.

  5. Chidume happiness. C.

    Is only God that will see us through. The kind of attitude we exhibit in university is something else, single at home married in school.

  6. Not all the reasons are actually good enough to cohabit with the opposite sex. It will only make more room for temptation and more mistakes.

  7. Agina Gloria Ebele

    It is very very bad for a girl to live with a guy that is not legally married to her,all these are caused by lack of parental care.

  8. what sort of nonsense is this….school marriage, I use to hear about this before I entered school but I doesn’t know what it means, is now that I know what they are talking about, destroying your feature and you are calling it school marriage. pls my fellow student if you are among those that are doing this better stop it because is very bad.

  9. The whole reason listed above may seem true, but in every thing we do there is an advantage and disadvantage
    Quiz number:18 Group number:15 A

  10. Living with a guy who isn’t marriage to you its very bad for girls.

  11. We tend to live a different live in school than at home, bet never the less the reasons leasted above is true.

  12. Onyia Ogochukwu Mary

    Living with someone whom you are not legally married to is not a good idea.

  13. A million reasons is not enough to live with an opposite sex that is not your husband in school. For God sake what are Nigerian youths turning into? where are the values instilled in us by our parents? why will you live with a man who has not done what is necessary in African tradition as regards to marriage.There are various skills youths need to acquire in order to sustain or support their stay in School:Campus marriage is an act of disrespect to God and our families.
    Reg No:2016054018
    Quiz no:53
    group :5

  14. This should not be a reason for boys and girl that are not legally married to live together it only gives room for temtation.it is a damm noncense,quiz num 81,group3

  15. students are meant to know that they are in school to study not engaging themselves into marriage.

  16. For whatever reason cohabiting is wrong and i stongly disbelief that prayers can be the reason why two people of opposite sex cohabit ,God is not an author of confusion and if they want to build their spiritual life they can do so in church where everybody can see them and not at home. Is that not temptation?
    Group :10

  17. Ibeh Ifunanya Cynthia

    Quiz no 154
    This isn’t right for children from a good homes, student are in school to study not to live with a man. if they are so interested they should do it the right way.

  18. Ezeakudo Mirabel Chinelo

    Quiz no:153
    This is so common in Universities and its not right at all, but people wouldn’t listen most Especially girls at the end of it all the man would leave them for better girls .

  19. Ibeh Ifunanya Cynthia

    Quiz no 154 Group 13
    This isn’t right for children from a good homes, student are in school to study not to live with a man. if they are so interested they should do it the right way.

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